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The Power of Imagination and Words

It’s not every day you see a royal blue call box sporting a mast and sails. “Well, aren’t you lovely?” I whispered as she proudly unfurled her flag. It wasn’t one I recognized; I’d expected a Jolly Roger, but this was gold flame and purple smoke on a field of crimson, and unlike any flag I’d seen before. “It’s our flag,” explained Emmett.... read more

Why Me?

“Should we tell her?” “She’ll figure it out, soon enough.” I overheard them whispering while I tried desperately to shed the futility of fifty-thousand thousand words in an afternoon. I’d seen it done, once or twice; instead of giving me hope, the knowledge that it was possible only heaped a larger dollop of inadequacy on my head. The realization that I’d picked a... read more

Drunk on Freedom, Dancing with the Jinn

NaBloPoMo. NaNoWriMo. NaNoBloWriPoMo... “There’s just no redeeming this month, is there?” I asked Emmett, dejectedly. “Sure there is,” he said, grinning from ear to ear. He emerged from my kitchen bearing a large Mason jar full of freshly-squeezed pineapple juice. “Where did you get that?” I asked. I hadn’t bought pineapples or juice in a while. If... read more

There’s No Place Like 127.0.0.1

“Come on, Emmett, let’s go home.” New Orleans, bright and colorful and smelling of beignets and stale booze and coffee, now seemed soured and sinister. “You don’t want to explore the city while we’re here? It’s strange how much – and how little – has changed.” Emmett’s gaze traveled 360 degrees to take in all the hustle and bustle that... read more

Like Sand Through the Motherboard

As we walked the streets of the French Quarter, I continued to ponder the plot, idly wondering which of Grimm’s fairy tales I was living. Perhaps I wasn’t living; perhaps I’d fallen, hit my head, and was somewhere hooked up to life support… I struggled to keep up with Emmett’s longer stride, and realized that if I were on life-support, my now-ragged breathing would have set... read more

Like Fireflies in a Pickle Jar

“What the hell just happened back there?” I asked. “You two have a history, don’t you? How’d I get dragged into this? Talk to me, Emmett, or I swear to God I’ll hire a car, drive back to Houston, and leave you here.” The old woman had kicked us out of the courtyard after foisting her “seven year warranty” on me and refusing me a refund on the PC from... read more

Madame and the Warranty

The beignets were certainly as good as I remembered them. Warm, slightly chewy dough, deep-fried and liberally dusted with powdered sugar, they practically melted in my mouth. The coffee was strong enough to hold up to milk and sharpened all my senses. “So, you know New Orleans?” I was grasping for the connection. “Of course. It’s a port city. How would I not know New... read more

It’s…Different on the Inside

We began to roll out of the driveway. Emmett examined the dashboard with great interest.He fiddled with the AC knob and radio seek buttons, startling himself as the radio landed on a rather loud Death Metal station. “First car trip?” I asked. There would likely be a lot of firsts, all within the first hour or two of our road trip. Emmett nodded. Though he was a little scrunched over there in... read more

Getting to Know You, Getting to Know All About You

Barefoot and dressed only in a thin black tank top and California Crazee pants, I made a beeline for the coffee maker. My new friend was already up, trying to figure out how to use the satellite and DVR with its six remotes – each of them having one or more unique functions and about 97 buttons that all did the same thing. “So, what’s your name?” I asked, scooping heaping... read more

The Challenge

“The challenge,” Prunebutt mused, “is not to think too far ahead.” It referred, of course, to my compulsive, headlong commitment to things like NaBloPoMo and NaNoWriMo. I used to refer to these as “Nah, go blow me” and “Nah, no wri’ mo…” but I’ve stuck with the latter, more out of a sense of tradition than anything else, for fifteen years.... read more

Content Curation with Klout

Still interested in “content curation”? How about in “discovering good, relevant things to share with friends who share your interests”? You don’t want to bore or alienate your readers by sharing only your own posts, right? Content curation – choosing the right posts for the right audience at the right times, is a great idea. It’s also good karma to promote... read more

Breaking “Rule 21”: Saying Nice Things About Pussy

Well, not mine – I don’t blog about mine and we’ve already established I don’t have any pets. But pussy here has good taste in men, and she’s not about to put up with anyone grabbing her without explicit consent. She is unmoved by fame, fortune, and notoriety. In fact, she’ll stare you down and if the claws come out, I guarantee you’ll flinch first. This pussy... read more

Breaking “Rule 22”: Complimenting the Dog

Well, this one’s going to be a bit tricky… You see, I don’t have a dog. My husband doesn’t dislike animals, but doesn’t want one in the house. Early in our marriage, he made it quite clear that I would have to choose between a husband or a pet – and so far, for more than 32 years – he has won out. It’s really not a close contest, to be honest. And having a... read more

Help Right a Shameful Wrong: Restore National Guard Re-Enlistment Bonuses

Help right a shameful wrong. As a citizen of this country, I’m ashamed that our government is asking its servicemen and women to repay what it terms “excessive” re-enlistment bonuses promised to National Guardsmen to get them to re-enlist and serve overseas in U.S. combat operations. We honor our contracts. We honor our young men and women who serve. We punish wrongdoers, not those who... read more

How to Set Up and Use TweetDeck to Manage Twitter

If you love Twitter but want a way to organize your timeline and manage your activity more effectively, there, you may want to give Tweetdeck a try. Tweetdeck is free, and it’s owned by Twitter. To set up and use Tweetdeck, simply go to Tweetdeck.com and log in using your Twitter account.  One of the first things you’ll notice is how Tweetdeck divides your timeline into several columns. By... read more

Breaking “Rule 23”: A (Not So) Recent Sexual (Mis)Adventure!

Define “recent.” I could certainly make one up. I once volunteered to run an Adult Writing Workshop. I had no idea what I was signing up for – and when I realized that “Adult Writing Workshop” was a euphemism for “Erotica” or “Porn,” I just gamely carried on – I’d agreed to do it and didn’t want to admit I was young, naive, and had... read more

Breaking “Rule 24”: Dust Bunnies

What’s this about dust bunnies? Rule #24 says you shouldn’t “post pictures of the dust bunnies under your bed. Unless you mount them on colored paper, immortalize them on digital media, Photoshop them, and call them ‘art.’ You see what I did, there? I broke the rule before I made the rule. I had already created this little e-card gem on Writing.com, and later used it on one... read more

Breaking “Rule 25”: Naming Names and Kickin’ Butt

You’re worried, aren’t you? Why should I name my enemies, only to have them summoned, like Beetlejuice? Oh, right – I’m going to do it in the name of breaking all 31 of my blogging rules! Many years ago, I visited a “psychic” out of curiosity. This wasn’t a spiritualist, like in Cassadaga – this woman had quite the scam going. She gave me a creepy stare and... read more

Breaking “Rule 26”: Blogging Pithy Quotes

I’m pretty sure I proposed Rule 26 before Justin Halpern came up with “Shit My Dad Says” and raised breaking rules to a highly lucrative art form. It’s probably a good idea, if you’re going to follow Justin’s lead, to let Dad in on it – otherwise, he’s going to be very surprised to find himself played on national TV by the likes of William Shatner. If you... read more

Here, Hold My Beer – Watch Me Break Blogging Rules I Created!

After I posted “31 Ways NOT to Use Your Blog,” many of you goaded me, egged me on, encouraged me in my mischievous plan to write a series of posts wherein I break blogging rules I created as a tongue in cheek response to Microsoft’s proposal for “31 Ways to Use Your Blog” over a decade ago. How could I resist temptation like that? As with any form of writing, you can break... read more

Breaking “Rule 27”: Blogging as Journal of the Mundane

Dickens began David Copperfield with, “I am born.” Who’s to say that the daily-journal musings of the most ordinary blogger are not tomorrow’s great works of enduring literature? There will, perhaps, be a great nuclear fireball, leaving no library unscathed – and this, this record of the dull and dreary, day-to-day trudge through an essentially comfortable and... read more

Breaking “Rule 28”: Blogging Nasty Things About the Ex-Whatever

Have you ever skated on thin ice? It’s a rush, isn’t it? I used to skate on a little neighborhood lake. In the middle of the lake, there was an island. The water never freezes hard right at the edge of the shore, so it laps over the top of it, resurfacing several yards around the perimeter of the island better than a Zamboni could. Really fun to skate on! Trapped within this surprisingly... read more

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